7 Lessons About Dating for Single Women from a Newlywed

I was single for 5 years before meeting my husband. I went on 136 first dates during that time (lolol 👯‍♀️ and I kept a journal that will one day be a memoir on dating). We’re not even a year into marriage + I learn more every single day about what partnership requires, but here are 7 lessons I learned about relationships during that journey:

1. If they wanted to, they would.

2. Relationships require connection, communication and chemistry. You can’t have more of one for the lack of another. All 3 are necessary.

3. Energy never lies. Don’t ignore the red flags. Bestie, if they leave you feeling like “!?!?!” more often than not, please let them go.

4. People show you who they are. Watch out for what they do, not what they say they’ll do (and plz for the love of God, beware of the love bombing that feels oh so good but leaves you feeling like absolute $#^% when it disappears even faster than it entered).

5. Compromise is essential to a healthy relationship, but it is absolutely deteriorative to self-abandon by over compromising. It’s so easy to lose yourself + float so far away from the shore that you feel overwhelmed to swim back to who you were before you got lost in a sea of sacrificing for yourself for the needs of someone else.

6. Unpopular opinion, but single life is severely underrated. Stop rushing from one point of connection to another…you’ll miss out on building a life that you love (and if partnership is something you desire, it is that much stronger + sweeter when it meets a happy, whole + fulfilled human who is trusting the timing of their life).

7. The most important of all IMO: look for someone who adds to your life. If you’re looking for someone that fills a void or find yourself attracted to people who need to be fixed, pause + start investing the relationship you have with yourself. When you value your relationship with yourself, every other relationship becomes a plus + not a must.

XO
Your Virtual BFF